Review: Stephen Colbert's Book Will Help You Get Through the Writer's Strike

(From 2007)
Note: Stephen Colbert's show, The Colbert Report, started out as a satire of Bill O'Reilly and Bill O'Reilly's show but it has become, over time, much more than that. It's important to remember that this is satire because sometimes I encounter people who are unaware of that and want to take Colbert to task for saying, for example, the following. And I have to explain the joke. And nothing is less funny than having to explain why a joke is funny.
Excerpt:

It's not seniors' fault that they're such whiners. There's someone else to blame: Franklin D. Roosevelt, who gave our country Social Security, a system which rewards seniors for doing nothing.
Sorry, but retirement offends me. You don't just stop fighting in the middle of a war because your legs hurt. So why do you get to stop working in the middle of your life just because your prostate hurts? That's desertion, which in my book gets you the early bird special at the firing squad buffet.

That is all written in text so small that he says he's sure seniors can't read it. And then in big text it says, "Our elders are a precious resource."
If you, like me, are going through withdrawals from there being no new episodes of The Daily Show and The Colbert Report than I have a suggested remedy. While not as fun, entertaining or thoughtful as the Daily Show's book America, Stephen Colbert's first book, I Am America (And So Can You) will serve as a good substitute for his show.
If you have not read America I'd first suggest you check that one out. If you have already read that, though, pick up Colbert's book.

Some parts are laugh out loud funny, which was problematic as I began reading this while on an airplane. Other parts, though, are too obvious, silly, derivative of the other book, etc.
The best part of the book is a reprint of the famous speech he gave at the White House Correspondents Dinner which caused great controversy as he tossed out such first-rate gems as this while President Bush – Colberts hero – sat nearby:

The greatest thing about this man is he's steady. You know where he stands. He believes the same thing Wednesday that he believed on Monday, no matter what happened Tuesday. Events can change; this man's beliefs never will.
As excited as I am to be here with the president, I am appaled to be surrounded by the liberal media that is destroying America, with the exception of Fox News. Fox News gives you both sides of every story: the president's side and the vice president's side.
But the rest of you, what are you thinking, reporting on NSA wiretapping or secret prisons in Eastern Europe? Those things are secret for a very important reason:
they're super-depressing. And if that's your goal, well, misery accomplished"

But my favorite insult was this one:

So don't pay attention to the approval ratings that say 68 percent of Americans disapprove of the job this man is doing. I ask you this, 'does that not also logically mean that 68 percent approve of the job he's not doing? Think about it. I haven't.
I stand by this man. I stand by this man because he stands for thngs. Not only for things, he stands on things. Things like aircraft carriers and rubble and recently flooded city squares. And that sends a strong message: that no matter what happens to America, she will always rebound – with the most powerfully staged photo ops in the world.

Colbert begins by explaining why he did this book:

"I said on the very first episode of the Colbert Report that, together, I was going to change the world, and I've kept my end of the bargain. But it's not changing fast enough. Last time I checked my supermarket still sold yogurt. From France! See a pattern? Turns out, it takes more than 30 minutes a night to fix everything that's destroying America, and that's where this book comes in. It's not just some collection of reasoned arguments supported by facts. That's the coward's way out.
This book is Truth. My Truth.
I deliver my truth hot and hard. Fast and Furious. So either accept it without hesitation or get out of the way, because somebody might get hurt and it's not going to be me." He goes on to explain that the American Heroes are those who buy the book: "That bears repeating. People who borrow this book are not heroes. They are no better then welfare queens mooching off the system like card-carrying library card-carriesr. For the record, we're not offering this book to libraries. No free rides. Okay, now it's my turn to ask a question: What do I want from you? Good question.
Just because I haven't put a lot of thought into this book doesn't mean you shouldn't. I want you to read this book carefully. Savor my ideas. Memorize pertinent passages. Eat with it, sleep with it, let nature take its course.
Because what I have dictated is nothing less than a Constitution for the Colbert Nation. And, like our Founding Fathers, I hold my Truths to be self-evidence, which is why I did absolutely no research.
I didn't need to. The only research I needed was a long hard look in the mirror. For this book is My Story and, as such, it is the American Story….. Bottom line: Read this book. Be Me."

The book's first 10 pages, which also include an "accepted minimum standard of respect" (no highlighting, no doodling, if you need to mark a page use a second copy of the book to do so), is clever and has several laugh-out-loud moments.
However, then the book goes downhill fast and becomes mostly predictable drivel, the kind of stuff where, if you watch his show, you know what he's going to say. For example, you can guess that when he has a chapter about the traditional family he'll find a way to work in references to the Manson Family and Sly and the Family Stone as non-traditional families.
There are exceptions. I loved this:
"These are not valid reasons for divorce:
-Didn't realize you had to be monogamous.
-Time period covered by pre-nup expired.
-Your married name is something like Anita Hardcock.
-Girl you had a crush on in high school just got divorced.
One of the final chapters, on science, is also pretty funny. But if you're looking for maximum yucks then read the first 10 pages and the last 10 pages (that's where his speech is at).
If you are looking for some witty, sharp humor you can certainly do worse than reading this book. Speaking of which…
Last month, as I drove to and from Philadelphia for the Newsvine Vinemeet, I listened to an audiobook by Dave Barry - History of the Millenium (So Far) - it was a collection of his year end columns which I had remembered as being quite amusing. I'm not sure if he became less funny or if my sense of humor changed but I laughed maybe once every four hours (the tape was about 8 hours though it seemed like 15)
The best thing about Dave Barry is that he's stopped writing his weakly column, instead just writing the end of the year review and this gift guide. So at least he knew to retire when he was becoming less funny.
It was probably a combination of both factors – my sense of humor changing and he became more predictable - but the important thing was that it was quite disappointing. If you want to relive and be reminded of all of the jokes and problems in Florida with its elections, and the nation's weird obsessions with, say, the Runaway Bride, then check out Barry's book.
If you want to read something more sharp and modern than check out Colbert's book or the Daily Show book.